Childhood

Fluttering past strands of jade
Butterfly s-a-i-l-s up floats
d
o
w
n
Lovingly kisses dew drops in the morning sun(shine)

Camaraderie is fresh within young hearts
Jumpthroughpuddles
splish!
splash!
Cashew colored hair whips wildly around smiling faces

Day closes, fun drifts – good-bye-
Mother makes lasagna
sleeeepinesss descends heavily as

Rain r-a-m-b-l-e-s on a tin roof
beating as I watch the crescent moon
wade among a plethora of vivacious stars

Wet drops f a l l below,
smacking the warm cement on
a sultry August night

Sandwich

This poem used to look like a sandwich...stupid blog...

Life is like a sandwich.
Sometimes you eat the sandwich,
And sometimes the sandwich eats you.
Multifaceted like the juicy red and crisp
Green is life, yet the layers seem less
Distinguishable than that of a sandwich.

Sometimes sandwiches become soggy,
Weighed down by tomato tears. Defenses
On supposed impermeable layers have failed.
The Brie is left to mold, the meat to go sour,
Donning the repugnant smell of
Something gone a rye.
But even the vilest creation could satisfy the mouth of a hungry pig waiting on a free meal.
The cycle of life is evident, in that
Pigs eat sandwiches, and we eat pigs on
Our sandwiches. Life can still be a cruel joke,
Even when refrigerated properly. Life can become
Complicated when we cross contaminate society’s raw
Pig juices with our own soft, bread like brains. We can forget
To wash our cutting boards each day, and start anew.

But just as in life, one true sandwich does not exist.
Mary on a grilled cheese just doesn’t seem
To satisfy one’s thirst for divine knowledge or
Everlasting life. Maybe a miracle of turning
Bread to stone can be preformed with the
Aid of a microwave, thus proving that
The invisible forces do exist.

Thoughts

Self-defiled
Hopelessmass
Ripped-apart
Drowning
Accumualtionof
Nothing
Always
Forever

Truth is masked by a false reality
Smiling genuinely acrid lies
Smoldering a scorched path

Fat
Old
Mean
Smart
talented...
(ReLaTiViTy)

Someone is always...
Fatter
Older
Meaner
smarter
And more talented.

Step out into the cool lucid dark night. Whispers of wind flow through the blue tinted shadows lying between you and the universe. All encompassing quiet, biting cold touches an icy hand to your tear stained face. Through great loss and deprivation we move on. We become better or worse from things out of our control. We are shaped by death, life, love, loss, pain, pleasure... Under the opalescent light of a moon half hidden by white clouds, thinking of what could have been, dreams crushed, they melt slowing into the stark lifeless night. A childhood painted beautifully but never more present that the wisps of smoke from a burning flame. Painted smiles, but real pain. Quiet, magical adventures, escape to a world beyond the expressibility of words. Sunlight brought magical real smiles to the tear stricken child standing alone in a desolate forest. Bright day surrounded by the resurrected plant life, painted dead, but really alive.

Time makes me cry
Death makes me wonder
Love makes me smile
Trust makes me nervous

I broke the trust of someone I love dearly. I know now that I can’t be trusted. I’ve learned how much it hurts to lose the trust of someone who you were close to. Something just dies, and no matter how much you are sorry, you can’t ever take it back.

Time heals everything, but solves nothing, changes everything, yet is a constant reminder of the past. It’s been 7 months and I still haven’t stopped crying. It’s been 15 years and she still hasn’t stopped crying. We’ve turned in on ourselves, and have never fully moved on. We’ve gone insane but never fully realized that we can let go. Forget, but how could you ever forget someone who meant so much to you. Death is irrevocable final… leaving is not. It lacks the closure of death, and therefore is worse because it’s like an open festering wound. Death is hard, but I find life to be equally difficult.

Happiness =
Babies
Sunlight on morning dew
The smell of rain
Cream soda
Hugs
Rainbows
Roses

Raindrops

Raindrops fall, cyclical, ever present.
Drops of pearlescent sunshine,
glistening morning dew.
Saturated earth,
smelling sweet and heavy,
fresh, alive.
Finding itself in a particular moment,
trapped in space,
known only to those there to catch a glimpse.
Early morning rises
as bright golden arms
reach through nothing
to bring into being
a certain something glorious
beyond the comprehension.
Infinitesimal as that which is existence,
slowly shattered by time,
putting all things to a place,
and all things to an end.
Slowly as the outpouring skies cease tears,
colorful, majestic comes a smile to its lips.
All is at peace as small wings flutter,
reanimated is the life which flows through all.
That pulsing force
reminding each day
of something indescribable,
wonderful,
joyous,
pure.

Human Stupidity

Human stupidity never ceases to amaze me. Often times I wonder whether these people are a joke or if they take themselves seriously. It’s very difficult sometimes to find the patience and understanding to deal with these absentminded, often moronic people on a daily basis. But as Cary said in Since You Asked, “we’re the problem. It’s us, not them.” And when I read that I was immensely angered. How dare you tell me that I’m nuts for being annoyed at people’s stupidity. But then I thought about it and reasoned the point made. Coming from all different backgrounds and lifestyles, we aren’t all taught the same things. We each have a different pattern or train of thought that leads us all to different conclusions. And Cary made the point that even if we were taught the same things, whose to say that we would all conform and follow suit with what was taught?

I think if everyone walked around with a sign explaining how they came to any particular conclusion life would be a lot easier. But I suppose you can’t get upset about things you have no control over. If someone wants to go slow on the freeway, the only thing you can do is be in control of yourself. However, many times I think what we want to do is control others. We want everyone to think like us, to do things our way, and I guess that is nuts. You can’t control others, unless you’re an evil dictator like Hitler or something. He did a pretty job, but in a way he still didn’t succeed. People went along with his plan out of fear, but in their minds they were free to disagree. But it’s weird if you think about it… we all want to control each other and at the same time we are all crazy for thinking about controlling each other. And for what, so we can go faster on the freeway or not have to wait in line? I think that’s a ton of energy wasted on stupidity.

I think we do need to just relax and have some patience. I’m sure there’s a lot we can learn from each other if we just take the time. Like Cary said, “If we could just stop having rules about other people, we’d be closer to enlightenment.” But alas, we are all in the same boat of wanting to theoretically load each other up with bullets, so I guess we will just keep passing the ammunition, and hopefully try to make some progress. I think the meditation would help everyone in their endeavor for peace and enlightenment.